"Allow your ugly stage to be seen, to feel naked and exposed in the underpainting of your life. Allow the brushstrokes to be left in their full expression for the world to see and judge."
This line from Elli Milan hit me hard today. Because honestly? It feels so true to where I’m at in my art career right now—standing before the messy, imperfect underpainting. The place where things don’t quite make sense yet, where the vision isn’t fully formed, where I feel raw, uncertain, and vulnerable.
But here’s the thing about art—and life. The underpainting isn’t meant to be pretty. It’s meant to hold the weight of what’s to come, to build depth, to lay down something real. Without it, there’s no masterpiece.
And maybe that’s why I finally pulled out a self-portrait I started over a year ago—the very first canvas I touched in my new studio. At the time, the results were a bit jarring. It wasn’t what I had envisioned, and honestly, it felt too exposed, too unfinished. So I tucked it away.
But recently, something called me back to it, and I felt compelled to share its progression—the shifts, the layers, the moments of hesitation, and the breakthroughs. It’s still unfinished, still messy, still evolving. And I have no clue where it’s going.
But I’m here for the journey.
Because growth, transformation, and creativity always begin in the layers we’d rather hide. And right now, my goal is to embrace this process fully—to share the journey as I push my art to the next level. The good, the bad, the messy, and the masterpiece—because every layer, every misstep, and every breakthrough is part of becoming.
Thank you for being here. I can’t wait to share more of this journey with you—the process, the evolution, and everything in between.